Speak English, boy!!

One of the ironies of expecting Emiratis to speak fluent English is that people in high company positions seem to have a tendency for abusing English by coining pretentious and irritating phrases. Some are then used as mantras, others as peculiar verbs or nouns.



As a teacher, I had noticed this creeping more and more into everyday lexicon (is there anything more insulting than the concept of an officially excellent teacher?) but nothing quite prepared me for the wholesale use of business-speak in a private company. (Actually I'm quite sure some of these are peculiar to management figures rather than used across the business world!)



Here are just a few examples to give you the idea:



buy into v. to be brainwashed; to be coerced.

"Some of the teachers may not initially buy into the project..."



cascade v. to inform ones inferior; term implying and reinforcing hierarchical structure.

"Please ensure you cascade this information throughout your team..."



drill down v. to make a simple, manageable concept far more complicated.

"...take those learning objectives and drill down..."



empower v. to equip one who has 'bought into' a philosophy, with a particular mindset and/or habitual procedural tendencies.

"We're not here to teach the children in English; we're here to empower the teachers so they have the confidence to do that."



flag up v. to notice something undesirable/unforeseen; to notice and publicise across the entire e-mail address book the perpetrator of something undesirable/unforeseen.

"It's important to flag up a mistake like that to ensure it doesn't happen again. EVER."

Not to be confused with occasionally heard alternative usage:

"I'd like to shove a flag up (my superior)'s... etc. etc."



heads up n. process of informing someone (e.g. as part of cascade)

"A meeting's been called for this afternoon, after designated work hours. Just to give you a heads up."



quite key a. something that's like, really important. But not really really important.

"...and I think drilling down those learning objectives is quite key to the process..."



success criteria n. the set of predetermined desirable outcomes by which you can measure your self-worth, intelligence quotient, beauty etc. according to your ability to meet them.

ant. "Thinking outside the box"; innovation; pioneering.

"The success criteria for this lesson, and basically all the others in your education, is to allow yourself to be moulded by those who claim to have your best interests at heart."

Any more that anyone would care to add?